**Disclaimer! I talk about mental health disorders, allude to eating disorders, and my experiences with both. I attempt to be funny, but I do take mental health seriously and I do not self-diagnose! Any/all disorders mentioned are my real experiences and professional diagnoses.**

“How’s your diet been?” my psychiatrist asks me at the start of every virtual appointment. I never know what to tell her, so I say “It’s been fine,” or, “Not too bad, but not great.” And it’s the truth. A banana in the morning and instant ramen at night. Not too bad, right? But also not great. After receiving an ADHD diagnosis in 2021, I began taking medicine to help reduce my side effects. I started taking Adderall, which severely altered my hunger, therefore changing my diet and routine. I’d skip breakfast, barely eat lunch, make my own big, crappy dinner after school at 3:00, then raid the fridge for leftovers at 9:30 PM. I was inconveniently disgusted by the idea of eating, and inconsistently ravenous. I gave in to cravings and gravitated towards what was easy and tasty at the moment. I was always a skinny, athletic kid, so no one in my life thought to encourage healthy eating habits. But, as a collector of expensive, new-and-unused diagnoses (updated diagnosis count: ten), my diet is everything. The food choices I make regularly can be the worst (or best) decisions for my physical and mental health disorders and their symptoms. In mid-December of last year, I was fed up (pun 100% intended). I felt a growing, debilitating guilt surrounding eating. To do what I thought would solve the problem, I decided to stop eating. However, my cravings outweighed that “desire.” So, I ate like usual, sometimes more, then broke down afterwards and shamed myself. Thank you so much for reading my second-ever article, those are my tips for a healthy lifestyle!

Yeah, no.

That sucked.

I love food! I’m not sure if I’m “supposed to” feel embarrassed admitting that, but I’m not. Food, and more recently cooking and baking, is awesome, and it’s always been a big part of my life. Once I began to hate myself for giving my body the food it needed (…and wanted…), I knew something had to change. It took months for me to begin this, for lack of a less-cliché word, journey, and many failed attempts. I always admired the idea of being vegetarian, but my family has grown up with an emphasis on eating meat. Many people, like my mother and step-father, falsely believe that eating meat daily is a healthy option, but that’s an entire article on its own. My attempts to educate my family and get them to partially join me were in vain. When I talked to my friends about vegetarianism, they responded with “Oh my god, I could never live without meat!” And you know who you are. If that wasn’t enough, plant-based meat has the potential to really suck! And switching from a meat-based to plant-based diet can also suck! Change sucks! But, that’s also an article in and of itself. Needless to say, due to familial and societal factors, I gave up very, very quickly. Like, its-been-less-than-a-week-and-I’m-actually-so-done quickly.

Despite my overwhelming discouragement and lack of dedication, one excerpt from a documentary in health class had me thinking about it once again. I had been experiencing unexplained stomach pains after nearly every meal. Watching the Game Changers video, I quickly realized what had to be done. My journey to a meatless diet, part three (???) began once again! The video, linked at the bottom of this article, addressed the health concerns surrounding vegetarian and omnivorous diets. It did so using the contrast between the blood of meat-eaters and non-meat-eaters. Two athletes ate a meal containing meat, and another (an actual vegetarian athlete) ate a meatless meal, and the next day, they all ate the same meatless meal. Some time afterwards, each athlete’s blood was drawn and put in a centrifuge. A lab tech examined their results, explaining that the blood samples of the two that consumed meat were extremely cloudy, while the vegetarian’s blood was clear. The second day, all of the participants’ blood samples were clear. Now, I’m super weird about blood, so this new information was beyond horrifying to me. Like, every time I eat meat I’m walking around with filthy-looking blood plasma? Absolutely not. This had to change.

I went home that day and immediately informed my mom of my newfound horror. Her visceral reaction still didn’t spark much desire for change within her, but she supported my resolution: I was going to eat less meat, the keyword here being “less.” The issue in my previous attempts was my expectations; they were simply too high.  I’m not saying that the cause of failure is high standards, or suggesting that those who don’t immediately reach their goals lower their expectations because, hey, clearly you weren’t good enough anyway! The reason I don’t believe those things is because they’re not true (they’re also kinda defeatist and I just can’t go back to that way of thinking)! It was due to my altered approach that my transition to vegetarianism has been significantly more successful. Rather than telling myself to quit eating meat cold-turkey (get it?), I decided to take smaller steps. I’ve broken up my journey into a list of dos, don’ts, allowances, and assurances:

The Six Commandments of Sorta Vegetarianism

1. Don’t eat meat daily. Routine makes change harder.
2. Look out for vegetarian options when going out to eat– it’s nice to change things up, and some spots really pull through with their meatless menu!

2.a. Treat yourself! Saving meat for special occasions/eating out can help make meat less of a regular staple, and more of a special treat. It can be used to reward you for your awesome progress and effort!

3. Scrolling through meatless recipes on Pinterest is great, but consider reimagining some familiar foods too. Not everything that has meat needs it!
4. No trackers = less pressure + less guilt.

(Note: Trackers might totally work for you, and that’s great! But for people like me, trackers can lead to guilt-driven motivation, and that’s the total opposite of what I want when trying to heal my relationship with food! Also this is my list so I make the rules.)

5. Keep trying new everythings! Don’t deprive yourself of experiences and opportunities.

So yeah, things have been great so far. I feel better about myself, and the active decision to avoid meat has become a lot easier over time. In fact, it’s rewarding, and it’s been an exciting culinary adventure! Not only that, but my family is supporting me even more and doing research of their own, my best friend only bullies me when I get sofritas (Chipotle’s awesome vegan protein, which she ashamedly agrees on), and both my physical and mental health has been noticeably better. Ground sloth to wooly mammoth. The omnivore to herbivore pipeline. Oh, and my last commandment:

6. Make More Banana Bread.

Game Changers Documentary Excerpt: https://youtu.be/F66Sv2xNoxY?feature=shared